The Reference Call You Skip: Verbal Checks Beyond the Background Form

You found a volunteer for the nursery. She's warm with kids, she's eager to serve, and her background check came back clean. So you slot her in and move on to the fifty other things pulling at you on a Sunday morning.

I understand the temptation completely. When your volunteer bench is thin, every willing person feels like an answer to prayer. But there's a step in the screening process that small churches quietly skip more than any other: the reference call. The application gets filled out, the background check gets run, and the phone numbers listed for references just sit there, never dialed.

Here's the hard truth we have to sit with. Nothing matters more than child safety. A single incident can destroy your church and, far more importantly, damage a child. The background check is essential, but it only tells you what someone has been caught and convicted of. The reference call tells you what people who actually know this person are willing to say about them.

Why the background check alone isn't enough

A proper background check is non-negotiable. At minimum you want a national criminal database search, the sex-offender registry, and a Social Security number trace, run before anyone serves and re-run every two to three years. These checks are also a financial gate: insurers typically require child-protection policies (background checks, the two-adult rule, and more) as a condition of your abuse-liability coverage. Without them, you literally cannot be properly insured to grow your kids' ministry.

But a clean record is not the same as a good reference. A background check catches convictions and pending charges. It does not capture patterns, character, or the quiet concerns a former ministry leader might carry. That's what the human conversation is for. The screening process the source lays out isn't just "run a check." It's an application, a signed authorization, a background check, and a reference process. All four pieces are part of the same baseline, not optional extras.

Where the reference call fits in your screening

Think of screening as a short sequence you run for every single person who works with children, no exceptions. That includes regular volunteers, occasional helpers, paid staff, and yes, the pastor too.

1. Inform the volunteer that checks are required, and be plain about it from the start.
2. Collect a signed authorization form and a list of references on the application.
3. Run the background check (national criminal, sex-offender registry, SSN trace). Budget roughly $10 to $25 per check.
4. Make the reference calls before the person ever serves.
5. Review everything together, then re-check every two to three years.

The reference call is step four, and it belongs before anyone is placed in a room with children. If a background check surfaces any conviction or pending charge for child abuse, neglect, or a sexual offense, that's an automatic disqualifier, full stop. The reference call handles the murkier ground that no database will ever show you.

What to actually ask on the call

Keep it simple and honest. You're not conducting an interrogation, you're gathering wisdom from people who know this person.

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• How do you know this person, and for how long?
• Have you seen them interact with children? What was that like?
• Would you trust them with your own kids?
• Is there anything at all that would give you hesitation about them serving with children?
• Is there anyone else you'd suggest I talk to?

Listen for what's said and what isn't. A long pause, a vague answer, or a reluctance to recommend someone is information. You're not obligated to place anyone, and "I'd rather not" is a complete and acceptable decision when children are involved.

The rest of the baseline still applies

The reference call is one layer, and layers are the whole point. Even your best-referenced volunteer serves inside a system, never alone. That means the two-adult rule: a minimum of two screened adults in every room at all times, no one-on-one meetings behind closed doors, applying to everyone including the pastor. It means rooms with windows or half-doors so there's line of sight into every space. It means secure check-in and check-out with matching numbered tags so a child is released only to someone with the matching identifier. It means posted illness and restroom rules, and training every volunteer as a mandatory reporter who knows that suspected abuse gets reported to the authorities, not handled in-house.

Good screening and good structure protect each other. Screening keeps the wrong people out; the two-adult rule and visible rooms protect both children and volunteers even when your screening is perfect.

A caution I can't skip either

This is not legal advice. Background-check requirements, mandatory-reporting duties, and ratio standards vary by state, denomination, and insurer. Before you rely on your policy, have it reviewed by your insurance carrier and a local attorney, and align it with your denomination's standards and state law. Write the whole thing down in one child-protection policy, and have every volunteer sign that they've read and understood it, kept on file.

What to do next

Pull out your volunteer applications. Check whether every current children's worker has references on file, and whether anyone actually called them. If that step got skipped, it's not too late to make the calls now. Building your full baseline? The 100 Strong tools can help you put the whole system in place at /tools, and the milestones at /milestones show why this floor comes before families ever fill your rooms.

Your challenge this week

Pick one children's volunteer whose references were never called, and make one reference call this week. Ask the five questions above, write down what you hear, and file it. One call, one file. That's the standard you're building toward for everyone.